My Couch Is a Quantum Anomaly

 

Dude, I have come to the conclusion that my couch houses Loki, or some Thing.  You know, stuff usually falls between the cushions of regular couches and you find it again when you flip them, or move them or whatever right?  NOT THIS ONE

a really shitty picture of a part of the couch in question.  It was the scene of the crime.

This is a movie theater sectional, you can recline, there’ s places to put your drinks, it’s pretty snazzy.  Well, same thing applies, crap falls between the cracks.

 

One hitch:  IT IS NEVER SEEN AGAIN.  seriously we reach in trying to find it and nope, nada

 

Two years ago, my BIL was over for Christmas, and we gave him a multi tool for a present.  He put it in his pocket, and it just went missing, gone.  We looked everywhere.  We felt inside the couch to find it and nothing.

 

Yesterday, when I was looking for a Lego piece Max dropped down there, I felt something…I’m like WTF.  and I pulled out…the fucking multi tool that was lost two years ago.

 

Frank is going to re-wrap it and give it back to his brother (edit because I’m an only child and I didn’t want any confusion, that’s what I get for posting on only one coffee.) because it’s his after all and it’ll be a funny joke.

 

But holy shit,  Max would REALLY like that Lego piece back for his Cyborg lego mini figure.  it’s unique to the set.

 

MY COUCH IS A RIFT IN SPACE AND TIME AND LOKI USES IT TO REACH OUT AND BORROW STUFF.  HELP ME.  IT IS JUST A MATTER OF TIME MY CHILDREN GET SUCKED INTO THE SINGULARITY.  

Spoiled brat.

We are expecting a real nasty blizzard tomorrow, hurricane force winds and over two feet of snow. Hi spring? Ok Skadi you can go back to your mountains now, we’re good for the year.

So, I was at the dollar store buying some candles and food items we can easily heat up using our fondue set, stews, soups, mister noodles, stuff like that. Well I noticed we needed a BBQ lighter. I looked around the entire store after picking up some emergency votives, and couldn’t find it to save my life.

Every time I walked past the candle aisle I smelled red velvet cake. I looked at the pretty candles, and one practically fell on my head.

Red velvet cake scented candle. Once I picked it up a helpful lady came by to point me in the direction of the BBQ lighters. I guess Loki wanted a red velvet cupcake scented candle. He got it.

Shadow work Sunday

When a lie is told enough times, no matter how blatant, those it’s targeting start to believe it.

That’s how it started with me. Back when I started grade 9, I moved to a very isolated community. I wasn’t from there so it automatically put a bully me beacon on my back.

To get them off my back, first, I tried to fight the accusations and lies, but after a while, I took the coward’s way out and started to agree with whatever they said, just to get it to stop. After four years of it, the lies became my reality.

I don’t have time for cowards

I know, Odin, You woke me up with a Divine bitch slap. It’s time to work through the lies I was first told by the bullies, then, repeated to myself for almost two decades.

I’m not a coward and it’s time to piss or get off the pot. I am not stupid. I am not ugly, and having a sex drive is not wrong. It’s the “I am not stupid” part I’m having a difficult time with if you want to know the truth. It isn’t wrong to admit that I don’t know something. It is wrong to belittle myself with a blatant lie. I need to be more mindful of the negative shadows that want to take my thoughts to where they shouldn’t go. Self pity, false humility, cowardly based behaviours.

This is the long term effects of bullying. I let them win for twenty years, it’s about time I took my life back. Therapy helped some, but not as much as I needed. I needed a much bigger kick in the ass.

Odin’s self esteem workshop 101 is now in session. The beatings will continue until morale improves.

The Muse, and Him kicking my Butt

I’ve had a novel percolating in my brain ever since I’ve admitted to myself that I had a Loki on my shoulder and He wasn’t getting off..well..my shoulder that is…not gonna even go there for the other half of that double entendre. HAH.

Anyway, after a few more snippets banged out I’ve been told overwhelmingly to DO EET. Roxxy, and Heather who both read snippets of what dribbled out of my brain into the keyboard were like “ok WRITE IT” and Loki was like “Yeah listen to them, because it’s Me telling you to do it as well”

I was HOPING to wait for NaNo, but nope. While driving I had more and more novel things smushed into my brain that I almost missed my exit. Both times. Yup, if my kids hadn’t alerted me to the exit I was about to pass, I would have either wound up in Halifax, or Digby, depending on which direction my car was facing.

So, my Sci-

So, I’ve been writing. It might or might not get published, I have no idea. The thing is not every piece of prose that gets published now a days SHOULD be published, but there are some manuscripts that should be released, but the author hangs on to for some reason or another. To be honest, this is my first ever real novel. I’ve written short stories for as long as I can remember, so I can’t guarantee it’s quality. I’m pretty picky about what kind of writing I put out. Yeah I know, this blog… But this blog is more of a stream of consciousness type of writing than an actual sit down and bang it out novel.

All I know is, Loki wants the story He is smushing into my noggin to be put to ink, or ones and zeroes now, I guess. I would be dishonouring Him if I told Him to get stuffed. I really have no desire to do that. When one follows The Muse, one goes where He leads.

Psst. Mo, psst

Sitting on Facebook, just minding my own.

Loki: “psst, Mo, I gotta tell you something.”
Me: “Tell me, then.”
Loki: “not like this, go draw runes.”
Me: “ok…” *goes to room. Draws a fistful of runes*
Loki: *laughs*

Me “…”

Loki’s version of Lana Lana LANAAAA, WHAT! Dangerzone.

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=GUc6ZvLRqNU

Garlic Scapes anyone?

Husband brought home 10lbs of garlic scapes.
Yup.. 10lbs
how it went down:

Husband was like “Man I love these, wish I could find more!” Loki is like “I like them too…hold on..” Freyr was like “Meh I know a guy.” and Loki was like “Dude make it happen!” Freyr was like “Meh ok” Frank called me from work and was like “I have a 10lb bag of garlic scapes on my desk..I’m bringing them home” Loki: “Eeexxxcceelent”

When Loki takes over an MMO chat

When Loki takes over a chat channel in an MMO:

Person1: Odin’s Beard about Hot Pockets? LOL

Me: Odin Loves Him some hotpockets

Person1: …

Person1: Damn channels.

Me: *giggle*

Person2: That’s how Odin got the eye patch. Spurting hot pocket. Fact.

Person1: LOL

Person2: And also why Hot Pockets invariably lead to diarhea. Loki is a tricker, and the hot pocket is one of his machinations.

Person3: hot pockets?

Person4: It was Loki’s plan to get Odin’s Beard all gooey with cheese and he would be unable to battle in Rangnarok.

 

So there you have it,  Hot Pockets will destroy the world *nodnod*  

of course Odin was *facepalm* and Loki thought it was hillarious.

5am wakeup call

BOOM  *FLASH*

*house kinda shakes*

Me “Morning Thor…thanks for moving this system out faster”

Thor: “Not a problem!”

*BOOM CRASH* *HISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS* (Rain hitting the trees) 

*I go back to sleep*

In searching for information on Mugwort

Ok, I’ve been drawn into trancework lately.  I’ve always known I’ve had *something* inside but I didn’t know what, so Loki, Freyja and The Crew, have been nudging me into dipping deeper into this rabbit hole.

Well at first I tried iDoser.  Meh.  cumbersome trying to drag headphones, a laptop, and loading the program, loading the dose and then listening until the dose is over THEN experiencing the trance.  

 

Especially me, who has kids.  Sometimes they’re home sometimes they aren’t.  I also have a mortal husband who’s a touch on the skeptical side, so yeah.

So anyway, back on topic here.  I was looking to see if Mugwort grew around here (and also to see if it shows up in drug tests or not…search still inconclusive with that..since I’m trying to join the Royal Canadian Military Reserves it’s sort of important that I know before imbibing)  

Then, my search expanded…I heard a whisper “Hey look, Mugwort is related to wormwood, if mugwort grows wild around here, that should too..mmm Absinthe..”  so I checked.

Heh. Yeah.  I dunno man. That’s going into the hugely illegal realm of distilling.  Making Mead is one thing, home wine making is cool here, distilling not so much.  Sorry bud.

I think I’ll just go and buy a bit if it doesn’t show up on drug tests.  Because you know, it’s legal I guess..I dunno.  Ugh. Tricksy stuff…