Category Archives: Uncategorized

Slow Donation Run – Please Donate

Reblogging to boost the signal. I’m unable to contribute financially right now but I definitely can boost it up.

Rant time about the medical profession



Ok, you might know me from various blogs ranting and raving about how the medical profession blatantly ignores women, gaslights them, treats them like dog shit and whatnot, right?

Well here’s another example,  from my very own life.

I have been trying to get my son evaluated for a learning disability for quite some time now,  going on two years already I think.  Anyway, the school told me to talk to my doctor, who told me to call mental health, mental health told me to talk to the school.  This has been going on for two years now.  Seriously.

The school is great, don’t get me wrong.  It’s an awesome school.  They knew my son had difficulties and came up with a list of adaptations that helped him along as he struggled, despite not having an official diagnosis.  I am so grateful to them it isn’t even funny.  The thought of moving away just gives me a bit of a panic because this school is really that good.

Anyway, my husband got tired of the runaround and made an appointment with the social worker to see what the military could do to kickstart things.  Welp…

He came back with a solid referral to get our son evaluated so insurance would cover it.  *One* appointment, five minutes total, and boom referral in hand.

Different systems?  Maybe.  Different doctors, yeah, sort of.  The flight surgeons practice with the province as well doing rotos at the local hospital, so they are part of the public health care system as well.  I’ve seen flight surgeons almost every time I went to the ER.

I just know that my husband wasn’t brushed off.  He was taken seriously right off the bat, whereas, I wasn’t. I was gaslit, I was ignored, I was passed along to be someone elses problem while my son’s education suffered.  *THAT* pisses me off to no end.

So yeah, special needs mammas, don’t give up, don’t give in, don’t let them get to you.  You’re *not* crazy.  Your kid needs help.  Your kid needs supports.  Get them.  Fight for them.  It’s so hard to not internalize it.  I know, I’ve been there before with my daughter, now with my son.  Fight until you win.

Something totally depressing:

I’ve lived in Canada my whole life.  I’m one of those Canadians who happen to be descended from the European Colonists.  The first time I’ve learned *anything* about the people who’ve been living here since before my ancestors showed up was a week long class in social studies when I was in elementary school about the Haida.  What that class covered was a trip to the museum, learning about what they ate pre-colonialism, about their totem poles (but not the symbolism behind them) and their houses.  That’s all I took home from it.

What sparked this?  Well it was Loki’s Bruid’s post about female sovereignty and how it’s been erased throughout history.  I remembered a blurb about the Six Nations Confederacy and how they used to be matriarchal before the colonists came and either wiped them out or forcibly converted them via residential schools and threats.

Do you know where I learned this from?  Assassin’s Creed 3.  Pretty fucking sad huh?  Now before you ask “Well how do you know that’s factual?”  Ubisoft got members of the Iroquois Nation in on their development team for this game.  Iroquois voice actors, the Iroquois language in that game is spoken by real Iroquois.  They consulted with the elders, they got the facts from the Iroquois nation leaders, so props to Ubisoft for that, they helped preserve bits of history from a culture that the colonial government is still trying to erase.

Honestly it’s sad, and I have no idea how to fix it, other than getting First Nations teachers in the classroom and teaching kids from early on.

“You can literally be murdered for being a feminist”

This is triggery as fuck. But yes you can get literally murdered for being a Feminist.

Anti-Porn Feminists

Grace Mann 01Grace Mann 02Grace Mann 03Grace Mann 04Grace Mann 05

After University of Mary Washington Feminists United Club president Paige McKinsey spoke up at a student senate meeting about the culture of sexual hostility among the university’s fraternities and the university’s unwillingness to do anything about it, the anonymous social media app Yik Yak exploded with insults and threats of physical and sexual violence toward McKinsey and other campus feminists.

After the rugby team was recorded singing a song about raping dead whores, prompting FUC members to report the incident to the school administration, the threats got even worse.

Then, on April 17th, Grace Mann was murdered by her roommate, a former rugby player.

You can literally be murdered for being a feminist.

iacknowledgebuttholesexist, found via Appropriately Inappropriate

The University of Mary Washington’s campus in Fredericksburg, Virginia, was hit by a spate of violent threats against a feminist student group for months leading up to the alleged murder of…

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A Rant about Gamers. An Ode To The Neckbeard

I’m gonna start this off with a disclaimer: I’m a gamer.  I play video games.  I play causally and competitively.  I *enjoy* video games.  I am also a wife of a gamer who plays casually and competitively.  I have children who are gamers.  See the theme? I’m not against video games.

I *am* against assholes who want to shove into the safe gaming spaces set out for children.  I’m looking at you jerks who want to take Splatoon and make it into a competitive kid-UNFRIENDLY arena.  Who want voice chat so you can “coordinate” (my ass) and win at all costs.

Nintendo has decided to ignore these neckbearded manchildren who fail so hard at  adult oriented games that they feel the need to prove their non-existent manhood at beating children at an online video game.  Their excuse for it, “Well children play Call of Duty and Battlefield.”

Hey honey, let me tell you something,  those high voices you hear, cursing you out, calling you names, saying that you suck, those are probably not kids, but women.  You know this.  Deep down in your black Brony soul, you know this is a fact, and you want to protect what’s left of your non-existent manhood that you will say a CHILD beat you in a video game instead of a woman, because it’s THAT HUMILIATING for you to admit that a woman is better than you at a game.

So you decide to go invade the safe space that Nintendo has put out for kids, because it makes you feel better to beat on someone smaller. Well sorry.  Nintendo doesn’t play that, and I’m glad.  I’m GLAD I won’t have some neckbearded fuckboy yelling insults at my children because they aren’t playing to their standards.  I won’t have some crazy ass PedoBrony approaching my daughter in a suggestive manner and verbally abusing her over a game.  My kids will be able to enjoy playing in a safe space.  Parental controls are a thing, I get that, and I use them liberally, the thing is, kids still need a safe space to game away from angry emasculated manchildren who strive to steal the joy from everyone because they don’t have any themselves.

Ya’ll are like Discord from My Little Pony.  Just stop.  Go by Wheaton’s Law and stop being dicks.  Let kids have their spaces.  Thank you.

Thinky Thoughts About Life And Death.

No, not talking about mortality and morbid thoughts about my time on this planet, but the process of bringing in life, and ushering it out.

A friend of mine posted this article up on her facebook timeline.  The gist of it is, “Childbirth is not a spectator sport.”  and I agree.

Any major transition across the veil is a big deal, and needs to be treated as such.  It is a sacred act. It is not for spectating.  Those who are experiencing the transition, either directly or indirectly has full say over who should be in their sacred space with space made and held by the support persons.

That space doesn’t end at the moment of transition. It’s such a big *thing* that care is needed afterwards as well. It’s a big deal bringing a life into this world, helping another soul take the first breath on this side.  Care is needed after such a huge rush of energy into this world in the form of a new mortal life.  Women, at least in the USA don’t get that.

Here, over on ThinkProgress, there is a blurb about how dreadful the USA’s postpartum leave practice is. Some have a year,  Canada does, I’m pretty tickled with that, some upwards to two.  The USA, the woman is *lucky* to get six weeks unpaid leave after she has the baby.  This doesn’t just impact breastfeeding rates, it impacts the whole of that precious time we call “The Babymoon.” Where mom and babe get to know each other, have older women help care for them and teach them the ways of motherhood.  It’s now just pop baby out, and get your butt back to work, leaving the baby in daycare, which incidentally eats up 3/4 of your pay in some places.  

How does this tie in with death? You know since I did mention it in my title, well let me explain:

They are both the transition of a soul across the veil.  One is entering, one is leaving.  Both need an intense amount of care and support, before and after, emotionally, physically and spiritually. The thing is, both birth and death have been so severely medicalized and the honest to goodness *root* of both transitions, shielded from everyone by the blue medical curtain that they instill such a morbid curiosity in people, that borders on voyeurism.  Back in the days before ushering the labouring mother off to the hospital in the middle of the night and back in a few days, back before shuttling granny off to hospice, they were at home, surrounded by loved ones and spiritual leaders.  Before Doctors, midwives were the support person of choice for labouring mothers.  They held the space for the mother to usher in new life, and yes sometimes, the veil wasn’t crossed successfully by either mother or child.  

They *crave* to see the taboo. Childbirth and Death are both viewed as taboo by our society, so both events draw their share of rubberneckers.  That’s why everyone and their dog wants to see the mom give birth, hold the baby, hang out when they aren’t wanted after the birth, and websites like bestgore and theync are so popular (DO NOT GO THERE IF YOU ARE TRIGGERED SERIOUSLY TAKE THIS AS A WARNING THIS IS WHY I DID NOT LINK)  

I gave birth to two children.  The one I remember the most, is the birth of my son, since it was the most recent, and the one I knew what was going on, so I can actually re-document it, and go back in retrospective thought.

It was like, I was going over to the other side of *something* and receiving him over there before pushing him out of my body.  My *brain* was not on this plane of existence.  It was like I was far away.  Gone somewhere dark.  Yes it was dark.  My basement was fully lit, I had my midwives, doula and husband with me.  My son got stuck after his head was birthed and I guess I walked from the pool to the mattress.  I don’t remember any of that.  I do remember the black velvet of the veil though.  Crossing over and taking his little hand, the midwife reached inside and popped him out from my pelvic bone and he slid on out without any kind of issue.

Death, I have not had a chance to bear witness to first hand yet.  But I have a feeling when it’s time for me I hope I have that same space of respect held for me, that I had when I had my son.

Did You Know I have a Youtube Channel?

Yeah I usually keep that kind of think private but, hey I might as well show off my “Leet’ gaming skills. Heh

Click link, click subscribe please n thank you?  It’s like, about gaming and Mech Warrior and you’ll see Goat Simulator as well.  I’ll put up personal VLOG’s and stuff.  But yeah please please subscribe to it and thumbs up the vids. ❤

Thor and His wives

OMGZ I love these candles! They’re so pretty! Anyway this kinda sparked some thinky thoughts:

I was having a discussion with a friend of mine about Thor the other day. How there was some people out there trying to reclaim the swastika as a symbol of Heathenry as a sign of Thor’s more esoteric powers and me getting a “Oh Hellz naw” vibe from Him. Somethings are too desecrated to reclaim. That is one. AAANYWAY this woman was offended how people just thought of Thor as a complete and utter simpleton because he’s more of a warrior than a scholar.

Thor is a brilliant military tactician and general. He has a very sound grasp of battlefield tactics and all sorts of good stuff. He’s quite a sweetheart as well. Everyone has different gifts and interests. One person might be brilliant at drawing, one at writing. Some are brilliant in ways that keep the artists and poets safe, such as making sure battles get won efficiently and with fewer casualties on their side as on the other. It doesn’t make someone any less brilliant if they excel in something you do not, or is not considered “important”

The world, both mundane and divine, needs many pieces. We all need farmers, fishermen, roughnecks, and welders. We need those people who work in Fast Food, and all that other stuff. Every position has value, but it isn’t treated as such, and that’s a shame.

I’m just rambling though. I’m just sick and tired of people looking down at someone because they don’t have the “accepted version” of what people view as “Intelligence” and “talent.” Ugh.

Super Duper Thinky Thoughts.

So, on Thursday I got a tattoo.  This is the tattoo, isn’t it purty?  10408624_734809429973125_8007216507536657391_n

Well it was.  Now it’s infected despite me taking really REALLY good care of it.  As in by the letter good.


Original design used with permission from:

Anyway, if you’ve noticed that wonderful serpent around Mjolnir, that is Jorgrumnd, the world serpent.  Do you see where I’m going with this?

What is an infection?  It’s just another type of venom coursing through ones veins when one acquires it.  Jorgrumund is *the* most venomous serpent in existence.  Now when I got this tattoo I did acknowledge Xis presence, I thanked Xer, and I knew that both Xe and Thor wanted this.  There is something that Xe wants me to acknowledge within MYSELF regarding liminality that I quite haven’t yet.

It’s not a gender thing.  I’m still quite firmly CIS.  I think I touched on it a while ago while discussing it with a friend of mine.  I’m pretty fluid when it comes to sexuality.

wait what?

Yeah, some days I feel like a nut, some days I don’t.  Some days I don’t want to have anything to do with sex, like completely ace, some days I want to bone all the consenting adult humans.

Maybe the correct term is Liminisexual? I don’t know.  Either way, by getting this tattoo I am not just bound to Thor Odinson, slayer of giants, protector of the world, I am also bound to Jorgrumund, world serpent, ruler of things in between.  I am bound to both of those who are slated to destroy each other.  I’m not a bride of Jorgrumund, I’ll be blatantly honest there.  It’s more of a….twin feeling?  But we aren’t siblings.  It’s something that is very hard to articulate but I know damn well it isn’t a love relationship, it’s not a servant relationship, it’s a relationship of equals.  Like we are equal parts?  But Loki isn’t my father.  Could be because we inhabit the same element or something totally convoluted and I need to really sit and grok this whole thing, either way, I’ve been connected to the world serpent in some way for quite some time I just never realized it until Xe licked me and  the whole venom thing.  Damnit Jorg You’re like a damn Gila monster. heh

Whereas my relationship with Thor is out of love and devotion.  My relationship to Thor is by choice.  Jorgrumund feels like it’s one that isn’t by choosing, almost like a relative, but if it was an “Inlaw/stepchild” relationship by virtue of my relationship to Loki, then that one is still by choice.  This..does NOT feel like that either.

So I’m bound to two entities that are bound to destroy each other or have already destroyed each other or are in the midst of destroying each other right now.  One I willingly chose, the other well I don’t know what’s going on but I’m kinda stuck trying to figure it out.  In the mean time, I’m just going to take my antibiotics and advil, eat my yogurt and go get rid of this stupid infection.

Maybe Jorgrumund will do the takesbacksies on the venom…that would be nice.  This shit is rather painful

Or you could say

My tattoo is pretty Thor.

Another beg, I know I have a few followers

Please click that link and “Like” the picture if you haven’t already?  I know almost everyone and their dog has a facebook page so please please pretty please like that picture.  I would REALLY like that as a tattoo and well it’s a give away so the one with the most likes wins.  So puuuhhleleeeeaaze like the picture.  I beg you I implore you my wonderful followers.